pulling rank and testing behaviors at school

My daughter’s aide asked me today if she should try to get belle to do things for herself and gave the example of throwing away her garbage.

this is what i wrote to them:

I’ll use the garbage example to explain the strategies that i would use to increase compliance and why. I’m really glad she asked my advice before deciding how to handle the situation, her patience and maturity is greatly appreciated.
my recommendations-

1. continue to build trust and respect- the more maribel feels safe around you the more she will want to do things for you when asked or even independently.
2. make requests in a positive proactive way- “Belle, how about if we move the garbage can right next to your desk for a while then when you need to throw away your garbage it will be right there.” In that way your are making the assumption that eventually she will be independent in throwing things away and assuming also that it was only a logistics problem as apposed to her being defiant.
3. make things rule based- ” the janitors have a rule that we throw away all of our garbage or we can’t eat or play here anymore – and we don’t want to get ants.”
4. break it down into small steps or make it a team effort- “belle, i’m gonna get your milk carton, can you grab the plate and throw it away?”
5. ask for help instead of giving orders- “I’m so busy right now- can you help me clean up here so we can move on to —-?”
6. reinforce- “thanks for helping, cleaning, following the rules!” “you earned a __”
7. appreciate small steps toward compliance, respect and cooperation throughout the day.
8. model what you would like to see and hear-
9. make it fun? that could be tricky, but we have lots of fun at home doing boring things

basically i think: familiarize, desensitize, reinforce.

I often think of that movie “My Big fat Greek wedding” when she says that her trick to get her husband to do anything she wants him to is to make him think it was his idea. It works with men and Belle!

of course, you don’t have to do all the things above with every issue, but one or two should help move things in the right direction.

Also, it helps that I’m aware of the problem because i can really emphasize at home that she needs to be responsible for herself and not to expect others to do things for her- even me!

Explore posts in the same categories: ABA/PBS, school, START info learned and used

Tags: asperger's, autism

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